My Faith Journey and Mental Health

By Rebecca Nolting

If you had asked me this question six years ago, my answer would have been a lot different. I have struggled with my mental health since I was a teenager, but it intensified the past few years. I felt God’s call to write about my faith journey, which required a lot of self-reflection. While I was able to see where God was with me in my difficult moments, it also brought out the emotions that I had hid away. A month after publishing my first book, I felt God’s whisper that it was time to step down from my roles at my church to be able to pursue writing. I was also showing all the signs of burnout and yet, so resistant to any changes. It was painful to admit and even harder to work through letting it go. This sent me deeper into depression and even suicidal. Those moments, while I felt like I was trying to seek God, were when I believed the lie that I was all alone. In looking back, I do feel like God was protecting me from myself, showing me mercy.

Along with the darkest thoughts came guilt and shame. I wondered how a believer could have those thoughts and God would still love them. One of the most powerful nights was when I was compelled to pray for the protection of others and myself. It was several days after I had spent time in a facility for my own safety. When I prayed, it was the first time that I felt grateful that God had protected me.

It has been quite a journey in being more open about my mental health struggles. I have experienced the stigmas of mental health: the awkward conversations when I start talking about my struggles or even avoidance. I have seen how others are scared to say the wrong thing. It is a challenge for someone to reach out when they’re struggling because they don’t want to feel like a burden or seeking attention. But, at least for me, I needed that connection and reassurance to drown out all the noise in my head.

Even though it can be triggering to me to share about my darkest moments, I have also found healing. I am hopeful that it helps to bring a little light to others. To show others they’re not alone, that it’s okay to not be okay, to reach out for help when they need to. Admitting that you can’t do it alone, whether it’s therapy or medication, God helps to guide us in making healthier choices for ourselves. Even when we don’t love ourselves, God loves us for who we are.

We all can wonder why we are living in the time and place we are. When I began my writing journey, I didn’t know that I would be a voice in the intersection of faith and mental health. But God knew. I believe He wanted me here “for such a time is this” (Esther 4:14) as the conversations about mental health have become more commonplace. We have a lot more work to do, but I believe we can collectively help people feel safe in sharing their struggles with others. Even if it feels like a small gesture, it can mean the world to a person struggling: a hug, a prayer, a text saying that you’re thinking about them, or being a listening ear. These ways can reveal God, showing they aren’t alone and give them hope. In this time of struggles and challenges, let’s all use the skills we have to bring more light and hope to others.