My Journey Through the Loss of my Granddaughter to Cancer

Everything was normal with our Sadie.  She was a beautiful and happy little blonde-headed, blue-eyed, precious baby.  She was beginning to walk and talk and brought so much joy to our lives.  Then one day at 17 months of age things started going wrong quickly.  After rushing her to the ER twice and many tests run, it was determined that she had Acute Myeloid Leukemia.  The key word here was Acute.  Treatment had to be started immediately and aggressively to have any chance to beat this cancer in our beautiful babygirl. 

After 40 days of praying and hoping and trusting in God, our sweet Sadie was gone.  I not only watched helplessly as we lost Sadie, but as the shining light in my daughter’s eyes went out, too.  I didn’t know what to do or how to help her.  I prayed to God to help me to know what to do that would help her, my son-in-law, my little grandson, and all of us who loved her to get through this heartbreaking loss.  We had the love and support of many, and realized that all the love and caring from friends and people we didn’t even know, was all from God – He held us up gave us what we needed to get through this valley of heartbreak and learn to celebrate her life and focus on the blessing of Sadie, and not just the loss.

For my own sanity, an amazing thing happened.  One day I found online information about an organization called Crochet for Cancer where they were developing chapters of volunteers across the country to make and deliver crocheted hats to children who were fighting cancer and other life-threatening illnesses.  I loved to crochet and after looking into this, decided that it would be good therapy for me to be able to reach out to others who were going through the pain that we went through while Sadie was in the hospital. I wanted to be able to share smiles with the children suffering, and their parents. 

I started a chapter called Sadie Sunshine Chapter of Crochet for Cancer.  Over seven years, I had people participating from all over the country and was able to bless many thousands of children with our Sadie Sunshine love.  God sent this ministry to me, to all the little children suffering, and to all the volunteers who participated.  We were all blessed in countless ways.  I would have never thought of this on my own and believe that it was a direct answer to my prayers to God to help me get through this.  Every single day, I am grateful for our God’s love and caring and compassion.  Each day working in this ministry helped to heal my heart as much as was possible.

As a result of this ministry in my life, my daughter developed her own ministry of toy drives in Sadie’s name.  She received truck loads of toys and delivered them to the playrooms in the hospital where Sadie was able to play just one time.  It made her so happy to be able to bless others because our Sadie lived.  God was and is at work in our lives still to this day (12 years later).  Thank you for allowing me to tell my story.  I give all the glory to God for the gift of our sweet Sadie, and for these ministries which have blessed so many.

Carolyn Dorsey, Henderson, KY